Expectations.

edge-of-expectation-elephantI think having too many expectations is/was having an adverse effect on my outlook on life, and strangely feel entitled to very little to nothing, that’s how small a margin that is.

I expected to have it all, the reality although I have achieved much, I did not expect to break, lose it all and by that I mean my home and succumb to the hell that is depression, and do indeed worry that through my unrealistic expectations if somehow, I’ve brought this all on myself.

That is not really positive thinking as such, however when you try your hardest for years to be good, or at least attempt to, in words and actions, to fall short is a heavy blow to bear.

So can I expect a happy ending, because it’s the dream we all try to attain, or do I just endeavor to do my best, these are the questions that go around in my head, I know the former wasn’t too successful so now perhaps I should try the latter, and it’s possible I might gain a level of happiness that can sustain me.

I often hear people say “they’re entitled” this particular mantra seems to be a new thing from the last 15 years or so, and the expectation is that others should be responsible for your actions and in turn your happiness, I know one truth, only you can be responsible for your life, even when you break the first step towards Mental Health stability is still up to you.

Back to entitlement, I think as humans were entitled to basic humanities, such as respect,food,shelter, to be a part of society no matter race,sexuality,religious beliefs, to act fairly towards others, as many don’t even have the basic equalities we have, in truth they have no voice, hence social stigmas undermine us as a society.

Are we entitled to happiness, that’s a loaded question as it can mean different things based on the individual that is searching for its meaning and wanting to apply it to their life, I prefer contentment as to me that means peace of mind which I’ve been striving hard for.

Ultimately you have to go with what you can live with, and unlike myself set impossible goals which can set you up for failure because my expectations from others and myself were to high and I paid the price and have lost too many years to this black dog living in my head, he needs to start contributing in a more positive way, because as I get stronger one day he’ll be evicted for good.

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About therabbitholez

I returned to this blog in September 2014, after a 2 year absence, due to depressive illness and homelessness. This journey charts the rocky road to recovery and my feelings about it, and getting a home together after losing everything, this too has been a rocky rocky, both things connected on many levels, but separate at the same time. If you want to know more please read my blog:) and comment on any blog you like I enjoy the interaction, and belong to a great community on here. Thanks for reading.:)
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7 Responses to Expectations.

  1. Gretiana says:

    I’ve learned not to place too high an expectation on people. I still trust and expect help and goodness from them but I won’t expect any one to play God in my life.

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  2. I personally endeavour to do my best… and hope that happiness comes as a result… as for a sense of entitlement and basic human needs… did Hitler deserve to be happy? Hmmm…

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  3. I really struggle with setting myself too high expectations too. It leaves you feeling useless because if they’re virtually impossinle, no matter how well you do you will still fail. I’m working on it in therapy at the moment, maybe I’ll do a post on it too? I’ll give you a shout if I go for it. I hope you’re ok, mental illnesses are horrible but you can beat them x

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    • Thank you:) I’m learning to expect less from others and myself or at least be more realistic, and not allow myself to get carried away.

      Depression is the bane of my life in many ways, but am fighting it every inch of the way, I’ve reached a level of recovery but there is still more work to do.:)

      Hope things are going ok with you.

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  4. nemyawaiting says:

    Ooooo, expectations. I can honestly say that my relationships have become so much more enjoyable as I’ve lowered my expectations of people. I don’t see it as giving them a pass to act reckless. I just think that people need room to make mistakes (and hopefully learn from them). But more than that its not fair to hold people to a standard that they may not be equipped to meet. I would like for people to be patient with me so I’ve gotta be patient with them. Right? I encourage you to keep chipping away at finding your place of contentment. And that, contentment, is a very realistic and achievable expectation 🙂

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