More pondering on the dating conundrum and my friends still keep insisting that I hook up.
One of the things I found when on a dating site is that men declared they liked “strong independent women” I’ve never been sure what that means exactly, I see many women say the same thing too, is it a special honour that’s bestowed on us by us to mean what exactly.
I like to think I can hold my on and debate in a reasoned manner, even if very passionate about a topic as I’ve matured I came to realise shouting loudest doesn’t make me right, I like to think that it was my youth that used to get me into trouble (raised eyebrow).
Back to dating, yes the strong independent type, a few men found that attractive on the first couple of dates that all seemed tickety boo until they realised that it was normal and I wasn’t playing a dating game (silly me) I was under the impression I was to be myself.
The other thing I found was to be in a relationship meant togetherness, which I’m all for, but not all the time I like to have the freedom to do the things I want, we all have our own interests and you can enjoy and participate in theirs, however I like the separateness and then coming together as it adds dimension to your relationship.
So is wanting freedom within a relationship wrong, isn’t this the spectre of the “strong independent woman” rearing her head that was at one time so attractive but now annoying and not fulfilling the duties as partner.
I know I sound super cynical, but at this stage in my life I don’t feel that I should pretend or play along to keep the peace , however but participate enough to share the experience.
So to the would be daters and my friends I can’t change who I am nor do I want to and if I can accept you warts please give me the same courtesy.
Perhaps I’m a” strong independent woman” after all, or just a women trying to make sense of the world around her before she falls down the rabbit hole again.